I’m not your usual demon.
That’s putting it mildly.
I’m fascinated by humans and instead of devouring them or torturing and killing them—the usual demon response to humans—I watch them, trying to figure out what makes them tick. What makes them so different from us? Why are they able to have long-term satisfying relationships? With both sexes?
I didn’t even know these things were possible until the first time I left the Underworld for the human world. Once I started watching them, I realized that the long life I’d lived hadn’t taught me anything. At least not anything of importance.
We don’t do love or even sex—
It’s easy to figure out why demon relationships are invariably short-term. We’re mean and nasty creatures, and our relationships are all about power. Who has it? Who doesn’t? Who wants it and how is he—demons are invariably male—going to get it? Even the lord of the demons is constantly being challenged.
Me? I’m just the demon at the bottom of the pile with absolutely zero chance of making it to the top. And no desire to be there, either. I’m a misfit.
So I watch humans.
And I wonder.
I spend most of my time these days in the human world. For one thing, it’s way safer here. I’m tougher and bigger than almost any human male, so they stay away from me. The other reason I like it here is that I’ve learned a lot, especially since I discovered the Internet. One of the few places where no one seems to notice that I’m different is the Internet café. Everyone is odd, and I’m not that much odder when I’m disguised as a human. The only thing I can’t hide is my size.
But other than being bigger than any human except a few basketball players, I’m no more noticeable than anyone else who sits in front of a computer on an uncomfortable chair, in a poorly lit and kind of smelly room, staring into a lit screen.
All of us geeks and nerds drink cup after cup of bad coffee, eat bags of chips and boxes of donuts. I don’t know what this diet does to the humans, but for me? It’s heaven.
Though I have to say that being a demon, it’s obvious that I’m not totally clear on the concept of Heaven. But I’m willing to bet that it involves the Internet, drinking coffee, and eating donuts and chips. Maybe being in Heaven is just feeling better than I have in my whole, very long life.
I want that feeling for the rest of my life.
But in order to do that, I need to figure out everything about humans.
The Internet has taught me a lot, but I need to know more. I need what some sites call hands-on experience. And last night I found a way to get that.
It’s an organization called The Pleasure Club, and its slogan is “where fantasy meets reality.” I realize both parts of this equation might be difficult for me—I’m not sure exactly what my fantasy is, and I’m certainly not part—yet—of any human reality. But I’m hoping that The Pleasure Club can figure out what I want and then find someone, or maybe even more than one someone, who can give it to me.
I’ve got one night to decide what to do with the rest of my life. A single night to change my world. They’d better get it right.